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Anonymity, security expression is very dignified, a man of few words, the gatekeepers Kong at the same time, think of some brothers still underground, the house, outside the house kept wandering. He said, to 1, although not under too well, but their side and some friends, http://doudouneparajumpersfrance.webnode.fr parajumpers, including neighbors, are working in the mine, many of them work in the underground. Underground work, http://www.hollistercofrmmagasin.com hollister, the wages of workers every month than he more than 2000 yuan, http://www.4007666666.com/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=72138 Guangdong will be helping 60,000 poor party members and family _ News _, but the underground live really dangerous, "psychological is not too happy." 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A not received 报平安 phone know the accident due to work with dangerous coal mine workers on well, every time give family members a call, then bathe, eat, to working hours, and the family did not receive the miners phone and means of production safety accidents, http://hhssy1.84.30name.info/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=51725 3 years in China funded life difficult moral models 1.2 billion. This time, the reason why the families arrived in time, the phone is not received family take snapshots. When the surviving workers out of the mine door, and the family wept, cried together and workers. Two injured leg fracture non-life-threatening It is understood that on the morning of the day, provincial and municipal safety supervision department has just opened in the mines once on-site meetings in the evening, the country posted in Liaoyuan City Administration of Work Safety investigation team also rushed to the trouble scene. As of 23:00, the relevant government departments are still meeting to study the matter, the Jiutai City public security departments have rushed to the scene to maintain order. Reporters learned Jiutai City People's Hospital, two injured at 19 am, was taken to hospital, the situation is quite stable. Lu shake-up (sound), which 41-year-old injured head, leg injuries, a broken leg, http://www.isabelmaranta6sneakers.com isabel; the injured Wang Haiming (sound) leg fracture, http://www.hollisteroutleteruk.com hollister uk, lower body can not feel, you want to undergo surgery, the families of just signing his consent. The coal company personnel arrived at the hospital to visit the injured. Yesterday 23:45 mine held a news conference, said Zhang Lizhong, mine directors for the adverse effects of the accident, he apologized to the community on behalf of all the workers in the mine, and condolences to the deceased. In the evening, the aftermath of the deceased's pension has been in place, and the national compensation standards, http://www.hollisteroutletevuk.com hollister; injured full treatment, the cost is not an issue. That night, the Provincial Administration of Work Safety Secretary Jinhua also came to the mine. According to reports, the incident ore miners, http://hollisterit.webnode.it hollister milano, five bodies of the deceased have been sent to the funeral home, http://www.hollistercodaonlineshop.com hollister deutschland.
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  18. Chapter 180 faith suspects
    The bright empire perishes three nations in two months immediately shocked the whole mainland, in spite of is a west or an east all is deeply shocked by the fighting strength of empire!But the clear eye person is clearly matchless the real content is among them.The battle is a demon what month archduke beat, can say basically is as irrelevant as bright empire.But even if such, still keep arousing dark black one inside the empire precarious oppression feeling.
    But at this time bewitching month, don't feel any happy, but with at present Su west the second big eye stare a small eye of mutual to see.
    "The month of the demon, you this is making a fool of me and father emperor!You can not use at all for 30 of our evil crystal cannons!!!You unexpectedly fool our three provinceses!!!"The west of Su is loudly second of roar, obviously is own really beyond control emotion.
    Month of demon ha ha on smiling, inattentively dug to dig ear, "woman, voice so greatly dry what?Seem to to eat me!I keep saying to sell to you 30 evil crystal cannon, have already said can these 30 evil crystal cannon use?Furthermore say, affair all lead so long, you just come back to seek me this trouble, whether a little bit make trouble without a cause?The time that is early some, do you why not come to seek me?"
    "You,
    http://www.louisvuittonbagages.eu Louis Vuitton Pas Cher, I, you......"Su west second drive demon the appearance of the month loafer immediately annoy of some talk incoherently,
    http://www.louisvuittonjp2013.com ヴィトン ショルダー, extreme of vexation under, unexpectedly be lovely quiet and unreal image of the noodles suddenly rush toward a demon lunar of bosom, toward demon month of the neck so mercilessly bit, immediately demon the month shout loudly 1.
    The west of Su is second to hum to sneer at to looking at to painfully pour the bewitching month of taking out the air conditioner, then gets angry with of say, "tell you, month of demon you if don't solve this affair quickly, I immediately let father emperor will your do obeisance the territory in month to destroy."
    The demon month helplessly touches neck, then the lookinging at of cajolery annoy to shout of Su west second, "good, that you call your father the emperor destroy completely, anyway I ain't an evil clansmen either, is not rare either you the ducal position of evil clansmen!However I the ugly words still keep saying fore head, do obeisance the territory in month up, there are my 50,000 garrison forceses, 100,000 lately- recruited private soldiers, also have 100 evil crystal cannon!In fact my strongest main force always all on your territory of dark black empire, don't think my startling statement creates a sensation, I that private soldier if really beat with you, I will ruin your half dark black empire at least!"
    Su west second immediately Zheng big double of eyes, dare not believe of looking at demon month, the quick temper immediately emitted and mercilessly held tight the clothes in month of demon, "demon month, you actually want to do what!I know that you like breeze bell snow most ,do you prepare to make her a women rule the whole mainland!!!For the sake of a women worth so!!!"
    The month of demon is slanting for a while mouth, then cautiously wanted to think, the facial expression hard looking at indignant Su the west is second, voice light but say very clearly, "I not for the sake of the light snow, I for the sake of all races of this world, the structure and form of the absolute being evil opposition has to break!Otherwise absolute being two evil races will always don't stop of keep on having been standing opposite.You want to necessarily also see for many times as princess Zhan of dark black empire, absolute being evil innocent food for powder of two clans just for the sake of a different faith and the different cognition the milli- nonsensely die in battle battlefield even the skeletons can not carry home town to once bury?Is your evil absolute being and our light absolute being all great you also stubbornly think till now?So, since it is so, light absolute being and evil absolute being why not in person to definitely, but make our these infinitesimal mankind jump out a dozen ofs, do you die me to live?Mankind should listen to those so-called Gao Gao in the last spirit?"
    The west of Su is second immediately stunned speechless!She has never thoughted of the month of demon says of this, what absolute being evil the structure and form standing opposite has already resulted in how much innocent soldier depart from this life, she has never thoughted of here.She just thinks that the combat will kill a person, this is the fact of blood.But hear a month of demon so on saying, she suddenly feels, oneself before think of, all for covering up a demon month says a kind ofly to cover a way, even was deceiving yourself as well as others!
    The month of demon almost destroyed sanctuary, light be the absolute being to still don't anily mean?So this is to isn't a proof, the light absolute being don't care believes in his mankind's living.So only the absolute being is such, evil absolute being whether also similar?Until this time, Su the west Be second to produce for suspecting own faith for the first time.
    The month of demon lightly smiled to smile and continued to say, "like, relevant you evil crystal cannon how use affair, we will send to exclusively use the person of evil crystal cannon for you right away."
    Su's west is second is just silly silly after ordering, suddenly raise head, very is hard looking at demon month, "demon month, you tell me, the two greatest empires will can't restart war,
    http://www.niketn2013pascher.eu Nike Tn, your troops and horses will can't beat into us after exterminating all small nations dark black empire!Although we the dark black empire own 1,000,000 battalions, for your evil crystal cannon I still feel matchless pressure!Tell me, what will your next move chess be?"
    "The father who unites you ruins a dark night palace!"The demon month smiles to say, then continues a way, " I think never so, this up, your father will be take pleasure in cooperating with me very much of?"
    The west of Su is second silent the language is not.
    The war of empire continues the war signal connect a carrying on of sky, the almost momentary pointed to a pike head in addition to dark black empire outside of all nations!Month of demon just in this time simultaneously is busy at the breeze bell snow mount the throne big Dian, simultaneously direct imperial of the troops and horses and own troops and horses gallop about a mainland!But gram inside Su get next chess of month of demon how after taking a stroll,
    http://www.louisvuittonjp2013.com ヴィト ン 財布 メンズ, the objection that unexpectedly neglects all big ministers in the empire, in a determined manner battle out with bright empire to have those to have a liking for go to as small as a fish nation.
    The arrival in 1007's destining is the exergue that a battle fire connects a sky, the weak at the mercy of the strong, two empires almost and crazily carried on to ruin the stroke that the sky puts out ground to other small countries!The structure and form in the mainland continuously of re- compose type!Keep till the last, unique month of as country is still existing a mainland, people all guess in succession, a piece of meat of the end, actually will drive two greatest empire which own!
    But the fact comes from the idea of owner to anticipate,
    http://www.louisvuittonbagages.eu Sac Louis Vuitton, the king of the country of month bends the head to concede defeat to the bright empire!Send the country arch hand of month to the bright empire, but still keep wanting to exist by the mode of principality!The empire official hierarchies all think that the proposal like this will be very quick of drive demon the month archduke veto, but the promising of month of demon lets more the official hierarchies could not touch brains.
    The demon month archduke unexpectedly allows the country of month to become a principality!!!
    Breeze bell snow at demon month of support under success the scene infinitely mount the throne for the emperor!And grant an amnesty to world.Breeze bell snow the standing deduced a Feng to dance sorcery for the world common people for nine day on the emperor city square royal feast, formally mark, the approach in impress ages!
    And demon the month be also cursed to organize headquarters of probably the intelligence report of the position.

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이 장소를 Daum지도에서 확인해보세요.
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"독도는 우리땅" 이 아니라 "독도는 한국땅" 입니다. Dokdo is Koean Territory

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    After coaching Alabama to a 42-14 victory in Monday night's BCS title game, Saban told reporters he's staying at the school, saying, "Maybe this is where I belong, and I'm really happy and at peace with that. "

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    In the NFL, where up-front money and salary-cap concerns make certain players difficult to cut or trade and where veteran leadership is essential for locker-room stability, Saban's style is an impediment to sustained success.

    He also spent an inordinate amount of time obsessing over the media coverage of his team — and trying to control it. Alas, in the six years since he's been gone, the attention paid to the NFL has intensified immensely. Watching Saban try to control his players' Twitter accounts alone would be high comedy.


    Nick Saban argues with a head linesman while with the Dolphins in 2006. (USA Today Sports Images) He is a good enough coach, especially on the defensive side of the ball, that he wasn't a complete disaster in Miami, going 15-17 before lying like John Edwards and fleeing like Saddam Hussein. As a leader, Saban was overmatched, and he knew it. And if the 61-year-old coach were to return to the NFL now, I believe he'd fail miserably. For one thing, his reputation would precede him in league circles — and that would not be a positive development.

    I was reminded of Saban's unpopular NFL past last Saturday while enjoying some Chinese food with Baltimore Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo at a Towson, Md., restaurant. Ayanbadejo, a thoughtful veteran who has played for a healthy spectrum of head coaches during his 14-year professional career, recalled being summoned to Saban's office in 2005 after learning he'd been traded to the Chicago Bears.

    When Saban asked him if he had anything to say before he departed, Ayanbadejo replied, "You're a good coach. You should devote more time to coaching and less time to being a jerk. "

    Ayanbadejo recalled during our conversation many of the infamous incidents that occurred during Saban's tenure, some of which were documented adroitly by South Florida Sun Sentinel columnist Dave Hyde last Saturday.

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  14. 因人而异

    西德有一个人,对于违犯交通规则的罚锾制度发生兴趣,故意把车子停在不应停车
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    沙皇的判决

    俄沙皇彼得一世的一重臣,状告一年轻军官拐其爱女私奔,在未征得父母同意的情况
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    多此一举

    一位游泳运动员横渡英吉利海峡,当他登陆时,许多喝采的人围住了他。一个犹太人
    走上前来,不解地问道:“您还不知道这儿有轮船航行吗?”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    男人气概

    一位卡车司机走进一家餐馆,要了食物后坐了下来。
    正在这时,门外来了三个穿皮夹克的小伙子,他们从急驰的摩拖车上跳下来进了餐
    馆,
    一个抢走了卡车司机的汉堡包,一个端起他的咖啡一个吃起了他的苹果饼。卡车司机
    一句话没说,付了钱就走了。
    三个小伙子走到收款小姐面前说,“他不象个好男人”,收款小姐说,“他也不象个
    好司机,你们看,他轧烂了三辆摩托车。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    捐款。

    一个替教会募捐的小姑娘对一个老先生说:“请您为上帝捐些钱吧。”老先生看了一
    眼小姑娘,慢悠悠地说:“我想我会比你先见到他老人家的,到时候我亲自交给他
    吧!”。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    智能

    约翰在机场侯机,闲来无聊站到一台体重机上,荧屏上马上出现你是约翰,体重87
    公斤,飞往纽约的字样。约翰十分惊奇,他十分钟以后戴着墨镜又站到这台机器上,
    荧屏上马上又显出你是约翰,体重87公斤,飞往纽约,约翰更加感到神奇了,他跑
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    伤心事

    一位病人去找他的心理医生说:大夫,想想我的处境吧,我最好的朋友跟我的太太一
    起跑了,他们已经走了一个多月了。我想念我的朋友多难受啊。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    医生

    医生:“坦率地说,你的病真叫我们伤脑筋。不过我们会在尸体解剖时查明是什么病
    的。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    天堂里再见

    某人给自己刚逝世的朋友送了一个花圈,飘带上写到:“安息吧,再见。”
    事后,他觉得意犹未尽,便又打电话给殡仪馆:
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    第二天出殡时,他那个花圈的飘带上写著:“安息吧,天堂里再见,如果挤得下的
    话。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    狗叫

    深夜,伊藤家里突然来了个电话。电话里传来一个女人气呼呼的声音:“你的狗在乱
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    劝阻

    法官:被告在打你以前,你有没有设法阻止他?
    原告:有的。我用各种最恶毒最难听的语言来劝阻他,可是他仍然用拳头打了我一
    顿。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    上帝

    精神病院里,一名患者对医生吼道:”我是国王,你们都要听我的!“
    医生皱了皱眉头:”谁告诉他的?”
    “上帝说的!”
    这时,另一名患者跳了出来:“我没有说过!”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    宠物医院

    一位老太太播通了兽医的电话:我的孩子好吗?
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    你以为我不知道?
    那么,夫人,请问,是猫还是狗?
    我是你的妈妈!!!!!!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    约翰的妻子对他说:
    “你看看隔壁的Mr。Tom,每次出门要吻MsTom,每次回家也要吻MsTo
    m,
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    打赌

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    咨询

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    越南人的抗议

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    醉酒

    一斗牛士在乡间喝酒,朋友们劝他不要多喝,可他为了逞能,喝到摇摇晃晃不能自
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    船沉幸存的水手在一荒岛上待了几年,有天早上惊喜地见到海面上有一艘船和一艘小
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    我去参观气象站,看到许多预测天气的最新仪器。参观完毕,我问站长:「你说有百
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    侄儿是邮差,有次到一家住宅送信,一条狗迎面跑来不停地向他狂吠。那家人不在
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一对新婚夫妇倾倾我我地坐在沙滩看日落,太太随便抓起一把沙,不经意的对丈夫
    说:
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    富翁想徵聘一位司机,他问每个求职者能驶向悬崖多近而不至掉下去。『三十厘米
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一个英国人,一个法国人,一个苏联人一同欣赏一副画伊甸园里亚当夏娃的画。「他
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一日,一架飞机飞过一个精神病医院…
    突见驾驶员大笑…
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一个波兰人看到朋友穿了一双鳄鱼皮鞋,大为羡慕。一问之下,价钱昂贵非凡,他便
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    脾气古怪的老家伙布先生,理发时总是多般挑剔,所有的理发师都受过他的埋怨。有
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    驾车游欧的女士站在希腊一处古迹的倒地石柱前拍纪念照。「千万别把汽车拍进去
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    男朋友

    问:为什麽在美国这麽难找到亲切体贴的男朋友?
    答:因为他们都有男朋友了

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一位牧师来到即将被正法的犯人跟前说:我来告诉你一上帝的话。
    不用了,犯人嚷嚷道,再过一会儿我就亲自见到他老人家了。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    偷儿到教堂做弥撒。牧师问:什么风把你吹来了?这星期你没偷火鸡吧?
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    其他鸡有没有偷?
    也没有。
    太好了,你已经接近上帝一步了。
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    警察问一个即将被绞死的罪犯早餐想吃什么?
    对啦,我想起来了,我最爱吃桃子。罪犯说。
    你知道,现在是冬天,哪有桃子!警察说。
    没关系,我可以等。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一次某位诗人和一位将军同为宴会的上宾。女主人极力要向人们显示并炫耀她对诗的
    造诣有多深。她宣布说:我这位诗人朋友现在要为我作一首十四行诗,并当场朗诵。
    哦,不,这位诗人推辞说,还是让这位将军来发一枚大炮吧!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一位先生对别人说:我太太和我意见不和。她想要一件毛皮大衣,而我想要一部新
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    最后我们互相妥协了,买一件毛皮大衣,然后把它收到车库里。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    吉姆,在你家里谁是一家之主?珍妮掌管孩子,狗和鹦鹉。而我为金鱼制定法律。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一个老人和一个年轻漂亮的女郎坠入情网,但是这位老人无论如何不愿意娶她为妻。
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    我问一个年轻小伙子是否打算结婚,他对我说:我要一直保持单身生涯,一直等到我
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    心理医生问病人:你是否听到一些声音,但却不知道谁在讲话,也不知道声音从哪里
    传来?
    是的。
    那是什么时候发生这种情形?
    我去接电话的时候。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    妻子(对丈夫):今年圣诞节,让我们互赠美好的礼物,象领带啦,毛皮大衣啦……

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    丈夫(对心理医生):我妻子最近产生了自卑情绪,我要怎么做才能使她保持下去?

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    妻子(在脱掉一个孩子的最后一层冬衣后):乔治,他不是我们的孩子!

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    一栋公寓的一扇窗户上写着:转让小号
    而隔壁一家的窗户上写着:感谢上帝

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    爸爸

    一位孤苦无依的孕妇昏倒在一所医院门口,被医师救了进去,她即将临盆却又难产,
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    同一个时间有一位神父因为肚子里长了一颗寻常狯到医院来割除,医师就骗他说他生
    了一个小孩,神父很高兴地说:真是上帝的赐与。便把小孩抱回去抚养;时间一过就
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    安全带

    空姐向乘客广播:“女士们,先生们,请扣好安全带。飞机马上就要起飞。”飞机起
    飞后,喇叭里又传来空姐的声音。“请将安全带扣紧一些。很抱歉,今天的早餐,我
    们忘记装上飞机了。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    证据

    律师质问交通警察:“一个人跪在马路中间就能证明他是喝醉酒了吗?”“当然不
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    先生,”交通警察回答,“可是这位先生跪在马路中间要把涂在马路中央的那条白线
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    因人而异

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    猫价浮动

    在市场上,一位顾客问:“喂!这只猫多少钱?”
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    “可昨天您只要20法郎。”
    “因为今天早晨它吃了我家一只价值80法郎的鹦鹉。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    味觉胜过记性

    玛丽安和韦伯是一对恩爱的老年夫妇。
    一天清晨,玛丽安对韦伯说:“亲爱的,我有点饿了,我想在床上吃些东西。”
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    要不然你就写在纸上吧。”
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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    让他为难

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

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    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    没有妻子的生活
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    马丁:“开销更少。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    验证

    詹金斯先生和他的妻子在吃早餐时,为家庭琐事互不相让而大吵起来。“你不会料理
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    说完,他气乎乎地拿着公事包去上班了。中午,詹金斯先生有些后悔,觉得不该讲那
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    着又问。“我正在验证你早晨说的那一句话呢!”妻子回答。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    去巴黎

    一家大航空公司的订票处接到了一位女士打来的问讯电话。“我想知道我丈夫霍普金
    斯先生是否买过飞往纽约的机票。”她急切地问道。“没错,霍普金斯先生买了去纽
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    预订了两张飞往巴哈马群岛的机票。”接待小姐热情地答复。“巴哈马群岛!”女士
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    停顿了一会儿,她说道:“我想订一张机票。”“飞往巴哈马群岛吗?”接待小姐
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    “不,”女士说,“去巴黎。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    改变习惯

    吉米说他实在看不惯他妻子的有些行为。他真想让她彻底改变一种习惯――呼吸。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    准备早餐

    “亲爱的,你只要再准备一下烤面包和咖啡,我们就可以吃早饭了,”新娘含情脉脉
    地对新郎说。
    “早饭都有点什么?”新郎问。“烤面包和咖啡。”

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    生搬硬套

    丈夫:你怎么搞的?这牛肉馅饼没有烧熟。
    妻子:可我是按照烹调书烧的呀,食谱上的做法是供四个人吃的,而我们只有两个
    人,
    所以我就减去了一半的料儿,当然啦,烧的时间也比书上讲的少了一半。

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------

    不可睡

    ?
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    能象计算机技术那样发展,我们现在应该能用25美元买到一辆一
    加仑汽油跑1000英里的汽车。

    对比尔.盖茨的讲话,GM反唇相讥:

    如果GM发展的技术象Microsoft那样,我们现在开的汽车会有以
    下特点:

    1. 你的汽车可能毫无道理地每天抛两次锚。
    2. 每次公路上重新画线,你都得买辆新车。
    3. 有时候你的车在高速公路上莫名其妙地熄火,你必需ACCEPT
    然后RESTART。
    4. 有时候你的车在左转弯时突然SHUTDOWN了,无法RESTART,你
    必需重新(REINSTALL)安装发动机。
    5. 当你买了“轿车95”或“轿车NT”后,每次车上只能坐一个
    人,然后你要给其它的人再买椅子。
    6. Macintosh牌汽车更可靠、更便宜、更快也更容易开,但是只
    能在5%的道路上行使。
    7. 油量、水温和其它警告灯将由一个“GENERAL CAR DEFAULT”
    警告灯代替。
    8. 新座椅要求大家的屁股尺寸相同。
    9. 气囊系统弹出前将询问“ARE YOU SURE”?要求你加以确认。
    10. 有时候你的汽车会锁死车门使你无法进到汽车里,你得不停
    地提门把手、拿钥匙捅、晃天线直到打开车门。
    11. GM将要求每个买车的人无论是否需要都必需同时购买一套豪
    华版的Rand McNally交通图(现在Rand McNally是GM的子公司),
    企图取消这一选项将导致汽车性能下降50%。另外,GM将为此受
    到司法部的调查。
    12. 每次GM推出新车,你都得重新学习驾驶技术,因为新车的驾
    驶和旧车完全不同。
    13. 你得按下启动(START)按钮以关闭发动机。

     

    《电脑笑话]》
    关于“软件”升级 。
    去年我的一位朋友将GirlFriend(女友)6.0版升级到了Wife(妻子)
    1.0版,发现这耗费了大量内存,几乎没有给其它应用程序留下一点
    系 统资源。现在他还注意到Wife1.0正在孕育着Child-Processes
    (孩子程序),这将消耗更多有价值的资源。显然Wife1.0是一个单
    任务、单通道、独占系统全部资源的程序。
    在产品的宣传手册和文档中并没有指出这种特别的现象,尽管其它用
    户曾经提醒他根据应用程序的自然规律这是可以预料的。不仅如此,
    Wife 1.0自动安装成在系统初始化时自动运行,以监视所有其它的应
    用程序的 运行。他发现诸如PokerNight(通宵扑克)10.3,BeerBash
    (啤酒牛饮)2.5和PubNight(午夜酒吧)7.0等等应用程序再也不能运
    行了,一选择,系统便挂起(尽管这些程序以前都工作得很好)。
    在安装时,Wife1.0自动装载了用户所不期望的Plug-Ins,例如Mother
    InLaw55.8(岳母)和BortherInLaw(内弟)Beta发行版。结果是系
    统性能日渐下降。
    他希望能在即将发行的Wife2.0版中看到如下功能:
    ——“Don't remind me again”(别再提醒我)按钮
    ——Minimise(最小化)按钮
    ——Install shield(安装保护)功能,在安装Wife2.0时可以选择随
    时Uninstall而不损失任何缓存和系统资源。
    ——在混杂(premiscuous)模式下运行网络驱动器的选择,这样可以
    使系统硬件探查功能发挥更大的作用。
    另外显然,你不能在GirlFriend1.0上安装GirlFriend2.0。你必须先
    Uninstall(反安装)GirlFriend1.0。其它用户说这是大家应该注意
    的一个永远的bug。
    因为GirlFriend的不同版本在共享I/O端口上是相互冲突的。当然如果
    你的时间片分配得合理的话,暂时也不会引起很大的不兼容性。
    更糟的是,GirlFriend1.0的Uninstall程序工作得不是很好,在系统
    中常常会留下意想不到的程序运行轨迹。
    另一个令人烦恼的问题是GirlFriend的各个版本不停地弹出有关升级
    到Wife1.0的好处的消息。

     

     

     

    《苹果的诡计》
    一次,三个苹果公司的工程师和三个微软公司的职员乘火车到另一个
    城市去开会。在火车站三个微软公司的职员每个人各买了一张火车票。
    然而他们惊奇地看到三个苹果公司的工程师一共只买了一张火车票。
    “你们三个人怎么可以只用一张火车票乘火车旅行呢?”一个微软公
    司的职员问。“你们就等着瞧吧。”苹果公司的工程师回答。
    他们都上了火车。微软的职员每个人找到自己的座位,而三个苹果的
    工程师却挤进了一个卫生间,然后从里面把门关上。火车开动没有多
    久,列车员开始收票。他走到卫生间的门口,敲了敲门,说道:“请
    拿出车票。”卫生间的门仅仅打开了一道缝,从里面伸出一只胳膊,
    手里拿着一张车票。列车员收了车票就继续到别的地方去了。
    微软的职员看了以后觉得这真是一个绝妙的主意,所以开完会后,他
    们决定也照此办理,拷贝苹果工程师的办法,在回去的路上也能省一
    些钱。他们来到火车站只买了一张回程车票。可是,令他们惊愕的是,
    苹果的工程师一张车票也没买!!!
    “你们怎么一张车票也不买就能乘火车呢?”一个迷惑不解的微软职
    员问道。
    “你们就等着瞧吧。”一个苹果的工程师回答。
    当他们上了火车,三个微软的职员挤进了一个卫生间,而三个苹果的
    工程师也挤进了附近的另一个卫生间。
    就在火车刚刚开动,一个苹果的工程师迅速离开了他所在的卫生间,
    径直来到微软职员躲藏的卫生间门外。他敲了敲门,说道:“请拿
    出车票。” ......

     

     

    《你算不算是一个网虫》
    通过以下80条自测你可以考察一下:你算不算是一个网虫
    .1. 你发现拨电话时拨了IP地址。
    .2. 你亲吻你的女朋友的主页。
    .3. 你的bookmark自上向下需要滚动15分钟。
    .4. 你的眼镜上印着一个网址。
    .5. 你发现自己经常神智错乱地去发现一些新课题。
    .6. 你拒绝到一个没有电力和电话线的地方度假。
    .7. 你终于去度假了,但是在买了一个MODEM和一个笔记本电脑之后。
    .8. 你坐在飞机旅行的一半时间花在你的笔记本电脑上......而你的孩子
    在上面的分隔间。
    .9. 你所有的梦想都被得到一个更快的网络连接速度占据
    56......ISDN......cablemodem......
    ....T1......T3。
    10. 甚至于你在晚上梦里都出现HTML。
    11. 你发现你在打(写)字时,总不知不觉在后面加上了.com。
    12. 你关上你的MODEM,就会有一种可怕的孤独感,就像刚从一次深深的恋
    爱中逃脱一样。
    13. 你把洗澡称为下载。
    14. 你开始把自己介绍成“Jim@net.au”
    15. 当你在某一个杂志或电视上看到一个www网址时,你的心跳加速了,并
    且每次出现无规律的跳
    ....动,而在这之前你的心脏没毛病。
    16. 你走出你的房间,才意识到你的父母已经搬走了,而搬走时你却一无
    所知。
    17. 当你离开房间,打开了intercom,以便新的E-mail到时能听得到。
    18. 你的妻子把一个棕色的假发放在你的显示器上,以提醒你她的存在。
    19. 你的所有朋友的名字里都有一个@。
    20. 当你看其他人的链接页时,你注意到都已变成了看过后的紫色。
    21. 你的狗有了它自己的主页。
    22. 你已经看了Yahoo里所有的链接,Lycos也看到一半了。
    23. 你不能打电话给你的母亲......她没有MODEM。
    24. 你意识到房间里没有一点儿声音,你不知道你的孩子在哪儿。
    25. 在你看来,没有什么比在十七英寸的显示器上穿着拳击短裤的男人更
    性感。
    26. 你检查你的E-mail,报告信息为:“没有新的信息。”可你还在一遍
    一遍地核查。
    27. 你一提到你的年龄就是2.X。
    28. 你为了上网占用了你孩子们的电话线,以至于他们的朋友不知如何同
    他们联系。
    29. 你的电话费帐单如雪片般飞来。
    30. 即使你下周就要死了,可你还企图把OPS保留在你喜欢的IRC频道里。
    31. 你把作业写在HTML里编码里,然后把URL给了你的老师。
    32. 你不知道你最亲近的三个好朋友的性别,因为他们都有一个中性的昵
    称,而你却从来不问。
    33. 你给你的孩子起名为:Eudora、Mozilla和Dotcom。
    34. 你以2400波特率在人们面前发笑。
    35. 你的妻子告诉你已经两个月没有刮胡子了。
    36. 你一个礼拜错过超过五顿饭,当时你是下载最新的游戏。
    37. 在公众休息室里你开始寻找流行的HTML地址。
    38. 你早上三点种起床上厕所,在回寝室以前顺便检查了一遍E-mail。
    39. 你搬到了一个新家,在决定周围景色时,你想到了Netscap。
    40. 告诉出租车司机你住在http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html。
    41. 你实际上试了123.elm.street这个地址。
    42. 你的女朋友又换了一个新网友,因为那个人的网络速度比你的快。
    43. 你告诉孩子们让他们不要使用电脑,因为“爸爸不得不工作”,而你
    却不去找一份工作。
    44. 你的朋友不再给你来E-mail......他们现在只通过IRC频道。
    45. 你买了一个特制的椅子,上面有内置的键盘和鼠标。
    46. 你的妻子定下了一个新规矩:“计算机不准带上床。”
    47. 你是如此地熟悉WWW,以至于你发现搜索引擎毫无用处。
    48. 你做了文身,上面说明道:“用Netscap3.0或以上版本取得最佳观赏
    效果。”
    49. 当打电话给你的ISP时,你从来不用忙于紧急情况......因为你从不挂
    断连接。
    50. 你最后的女儿是JPEG。
    51. 你把一个枕套放在你的笔记本电脑上,为了不让你的爱人看见它。
    52. 你问管道工:把计算机前的那把椅子换成带有厕所的需要多少钱。
    53. 你忘了今年是哪一年。
    54. 你开始歪头微笑。
    55. 你要求你的医生在你的大脑中植入比特字节。
    56. 你连接后打开你的MODEM发音器,因为你认为它听起来象海风......最
    完美的网上浪潮。
    57. 你开始怀疑到底你的ISP能不能每月都能提供给你200小时以上的使用
    时间。
    58. 你打开计算机,抛下了你的妻子。
    59. 你的妻子说通信比婚姻更重要......因此你买了另一台电脑,安上了
    另一条电话线,这样你们
    ....俩就可以在网上聊天了。
    60. 当你的汽车撞到山道的护栏时,你的第一反应是寻找“BACK”按钮。
    61. 你决定在大学多呆一两年,仅仅为了免费上网。
    62. 当你每一次按下“得到Mail”键......总能得到新的Mail。
    63. 你一次又一次按下,新的Mail还在来。
    64. 你的ISP考虑把你当成生意伙伴而不是一名顾客。
    65. 电脑看得越来越少了......可你不在乎。
    66. 你最后一次看表是晚上十一点半,而当你的妹妹早上七点种起床赶学
    校的班车时,你觉得只过 ....了一小会儿似的。
    67. 你建了一个如何抚平痛苦烙印的主页......但是实际目的是想收到更
    多的E-mail。
    68. 你的硬盘瘫痪了,长达两个小时无法登陆。你采取应急方法:你拿起
    电话手工拨打你的ISP电 ....话号码,你努力哼哼出各种怪声与MODEM进行通讯,居然
    成功了。
    69. 你开始觉得:假如Bill Gates是你的父亲,那么你的这个父亲就会和
    你脱离关系,仅仅是因为 ....你看了一些黄色站点。
    70. 你的猫总对你的狗的主页不寒而栗。
    71. 你的血有17%是Java。
    72. Yahoo用你自己的起始页欢迎你。
    73. 为了要命的速度,在你的房间上架起了ISDN线路。
    74. 电话公司让你帮助检测他们新的PBX系统。
    75. 你对人们如何走路感到疑惑, http://www.snclippers.com/ Clippers Caron Butler Jersey。
    76. 在IRC里的一些人提到:不用PC,而使用叫做NTSC的无线通讯协议,就
    可以获得全部的视频图
    ....象。你很纳闷:我怎么从没听说过。
    77. 你给你的狗一块用过的主板而不是骨头。
    78. 你的最色情的梦是关于计算机色情。
    79. 你开始想你是否该用Pentium升级自己的大脑。
    80. 升级工作完成的相当好。

     

    如果微软公司生产的不是软件,而是汽车,以下的事情会让你大吃一惊,并为此头大
    不已:
    1.当他们每次重新油漆,你也不得不重新再买一辆新车;
    2.你的车会经常不知什么原因熄火,你不得不重新启动它,即使你在十字路口,而且
    你必虢邮芩?
    3.你的高档跑车DOS型只能容纳你一个人,除非你购买他们的95型或NT型,当
    然,因此你得买更多的座位;
    4.你将不断因他们更换了任意一个小零件而不断升级;
    5.新的车型价格昂贵,许多人报怨不断,最讨厌的是微软在车里装了个很老式的IE
    型收音机,而后,又不得不开1000公里以上到该公司的指定地点去领取免费的I
    E型新型收音机;
    6.微软的汽车很新潮,没有离合器、没有档位、没有......你只需一踩油门就
    可以了,当然,所有的警示灯也只有一个:“普通故障”,所以你要在出现任意问题
    时,不得不选择--“CLOSE”;
    7.微软汽车的强大对手--SUN公司生产的马力强大的摩托车,其可靠性是微软的
    2倍、速度是其的5倍,但,只能在2%的马路上行驶(是不是超速了?)同样的汽
    车公司还有苹果......
    8.有一天,我们连汽油也必需是微软牌的,否则会不兼容;
    9.大量的汽车配件生产厂商宣称,他们的产品可以安装在微软汽车上;
    10.终于有一天,一些厂商不想这样了,于是,他们说,要建造新的公路,这次要建
    造的新公路是与原来INTEL公司建造的公路完全不一样的,叫做NC,只是,建
    新路要很多钱,不过有修建过碎石路的IBM参加。
  11.   用料:鹅蛋菌、珍珠菌、鸣腿菌、姬菇菌、白萝菌、松树菌、天里菌各备60克,红枣、枸杞、姜少。  作法:将所有的菌摘洗净干水分放入煲中加水,用旺火烧开后,放入红枣、枸杞、姜煮开, http://www.0755jdcy.com 眼镜批发,加入调味料(盐、鸡精)即可。  注意:各种菌一定要洗净并且煮熟,但不可煮得过久。  这款汤味鲜醇软滑,可是绿色保健食品哦。。  各种菌类在大超市有得买,部分可能难买到, http://www.0755jdcy.com 眼镜批发市场,没办法了,少几样煮着也一样好吃。
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